Did you parents (or a teacher, coach, relative etc.) ever tell you, “You’re better than that!” after doing something that you shouldn’t have done? What were they telling you? Literally- your actions or words did not reflect who you really are! Isn’t why hearing, “You’re better than that!” hurt so much? Because you knew it to be true!
There was a time when I went to buy some coffee and I could tell the barista was just over it! She wasn’t friendly to the customers and she looked like she was just ticked off at the world. When it was my turn to pick up coffee I braced for impact!
Now my order was for four coffees and since I was the only one picking it up, I needed a tray. A tray that this barista didn’t give me. Although she could see that I was picking up four coffees and only have two hands. So I asked for a tray and I could tell this frustrated her even more.
So she grabbed a tray and flung it in my direction, you know like she was throwing a flying disc. She didn’t take my coffees and put it in the tray. She didn’t even nicely and gently place the tray in front of me. She flung it at me.
Unfortunately for her the tray hit one of the coffees, spilling it all over the counter and on me and my clothes and shoes as well. Oh by the way, the coffee was hot too! I can still see her face switch from, “Stop bothering me!” to “Oh ^&$%^$%^#$@#@!OO” in an instant.
I’m sure the barista was a good person. I’m sure her intent wasn’t for hot coffee to splatter all over me. But something happened in that moment. Instead of remembering who she really was, she did something that was below her AND below her company (this coffee chain is renowned for excellent customer service.)
What am I saying?
When you’re tempted to say something you know you shouldn’t-or do something you know you shouldn’t, say to yourself, “I’m better than this!” Because you ARE!
Doesn’t it feel great when you’re patient, understanding and caring with people, especially the ones who don’t deserve it? Doesn’t it feel awesome when you make the decision that best reflects who you really are as a person, instead of a decision based on your stress, anger or indifference levels at the time??
Am I saying that you should never feel angry, stressed, frustrated, overwhelmed, or ticked off? Absolutely not. The reality of our daily life is that things will anger you. Things will stress you out. Things will tick you off. This is normal.
What I am saying though is don’t ACT on those feelings in ways that are unhealthy and/or ineffective. If you find yourself tempted to, take a pause before saying or doing something and ask yourself, “Is what I am about to say or do going to help me or hurt me? Is this the kind thing to do? Is this the wise thing to do?”
Lastly, when you’re tempted to act in ways that don’t reflect who you really are, remember, you’re better than that!!
